Her hair is a beautiful brown mane that sparkles in the light. She was one of the best models in the world and was going on a very exciting adventure. She was going to go on the biggest catwalk she had ever gone on. She knew it was going to be hard, and she was worried that the camera man would trip and fall on her like last time. The next day all of the best models came to compete. She did her catwalk and everything went well and not one fall. She became the best model in the world.
A really imaginative response to the question! The words really flow and don't feel as if they are just stuck in for the sake of it. Great use of grammar and punctuation but would perhaps work on putting in some commas. Keep up the good work!
ReplyDelete